Re: The Health Thread

[Flames]

U.S. Passes Most Restrictive Legislation Yet Against Health Freedom

The United States Senate has passed the FDA Food Safety Modernization Act (S.510) yesterday by a vote of 73 to 25 demonstrating a clear mandate to destroy health freedom in America.

The House of Representatives approved a different version of the food safety bill in 2009; however, the bill’s sponsor Sen. Tom Harkin (D-Iowa) said the House has agreed to adopt the Senate version, bypassing the need for a conference to integrate the two bills. Once approved, the bill will move on to President Barack Obama for his signature.
The U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) will now have more power to police all food companies under the bill. It gives the FDA unprecedented powers to preclude the public’s right to grow, own, trade, transport, share, feed and eat each and every food that nature makes.

The bill will now:

- end United States sovereignty over its own food supply by insisting on compliance with the WTO, thus threatening national security.

- allow the government, under Maritime Law, to define the introduction of any food into commerce (even direct sales between individuals) as smuggling into “the United States.”

- impose Codex Alimentarius on the US, a global system of control over food. It allows the United Nations (UN), World Health Organization (WHO), UN Food and Agriculture Organization (FAO), and the WTO to take control of every food on earth and remove access to natural food supplements.

- remove the right to clean, store and thus own seed in the US, putting control of seeds in the hands of Monsanto and other multinationals, threatening US security.

- allow the government to mandate antibiotics, hormones, slaughterhouse waste, pesticides and GMOs.

- use food crimes as the entry into police state power and control. The bill postpones defining all the regulations to be imposed; postpones defining crimes to be punished, postpones defining penalties to be applied. It removes fundamental constitutional protections from all citizens in the country, making them subject to a corporate tribunal with unlimited power and penalties, and without judicial review. It is (similar to C-36 in Canada) the end of Rule of Law in the US.

Bill S. 510 essentially will strengthen all the forces that have led to the consolidation of the food supply in the hands of a few industrial food producers, while definitively harming small producers who give consumers the choice to buy fresh and health local foods.

Here are the names of the 73 US Senators who sold out the American public's right to grow and sell crops from their own gardens and farms without government oversight, regulation or permission.

http://preventdisease.com/news/10/120110_US_passes_s510.shtml

So does the government have patents on food/seeds now? I'm confused about how growing your own food is an illegal act. What is the point of this? Eugenics? I can't believe this shit actually passed in the Senate yesterday, and not a word was mentioned on the mainstream news, as far I know. As someone who has become a health conscious individual over the last couple years, I am fucking outraged.

Ha! Right after I posted this, I find this on Yahoo News:

Army fighting fat, embracing health foods, fitness

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20101201/ap_on_re_us/us_army_on_a_diet

How do you like that!!??

[Sputnik]

Yeah I heard they were about to do this, now growing your own food is a criminal act. They've been quite busy destroying small farms all over the United States in the past few years, especially those that grow ORGANIC. The purpose is total control over the population, when they deem it necessary they can starve everybody. It's against the basic human right but we all know they don't care much for that.

[Flames]

There you have it. The military industrial complex owns the food supply. Food will now be rationed to military personnel. The peasants will once again be the shit eaters. Welcome to the Dark Ages of the Cryptocracy's Technocratic Purgatory.

[Sputnik]

Yeah, it's amazing how the world upifted itself out of the dark age to our level of technologically advanced capabilites, only to destroy itself again.

[tgII]

No shit, Lada, speaking of the 'dark ages', America's love affair
with paper is primordial.

And now, everyone, one of my favorite topics for discussion: taking
a shit. Come on, stop blushing board posters, if you eat you shit.

But first, a short required reading assignment called 'America's
Unwashed Assholes' to give you some background on this critically
important health related subject. Note: the title is hot linked in
case readers may wish to further their understanding of breaking
the habit of using toilet paper; or reducing the all too familiar
American habit of always 'thinking big.'

• America’s Unwashed Assholes
  
  Those who eat, also shit. Up until about ten months ago, [2007] I knew of only one way to shit: the American Way.
  
  In the American Way of shitting, you sit on a toilet, defecate, and then wipe your ass clean with dry toilet paper. Very simple. However, there is one problem with this American Way: it does not work very well. Even after repeated wipings with fresh dry toilet paper, some of the fecal matter that passed thru the asshole remains sticking to the body. By following the American Way, one of the end results is dirty underwear.
  
  Over the years, I had heard the phrase dirty underwear said by others and also used in the media. Although I had never heard anyone say exactly what they meant by dirty underwear, I always understood it to be a reference to underpants with shit smears, since, after all, my own underpants after a shit typically had shit smears by the next day, becoming dirty underwear in need of washing. Searching the Internet for the phrase dirty underwear, I came across confirming statements including the following:
  
  

  … after 12 years of marriage one of my biggest challenges is getting the shit stains outta his underwear …
  

  With middle age comes changes: both the mind and the body decline in various ways. I entered middle age about a month after my 41st birthday, undergoing the various bodily changes—such as a decrease in how much the bladder can empty—that are described in the medical literature. Also, in my first month of middle age, my former ability to do mental work about 70 hours per week—in my case, programming work—rapidly declined to about 40 hours per week (after I had experienced this mental-work decline, which has remained unchanged since then, I understood where the 40-hour work-week came from).
  
  Although for the most part the big middle-age changes that I experienced happened to me in that first month of middle age, there have been a few lesser changes that have happened in the last few years. One of these lesser changes was that I was apparently becoming intolerant to the leftover fecal matter that remained after wiping with dry toilet paper. In an effort to address this problem I searched the Internet and learned that the majority of the people in the world use water to clean their asses after shitting. In Europe, for example, the bidet is used for this purpose.

Just image, roughly 35 million rolls of perfectly good paper
get flushed down the toilet with millions of gallons of good
clean water every single day in America. Is it any wonder the
eugenicists and depopulationists want to triage your
asses, the savings in carbon saved from 35 million rolls of
paper consumed daily would be worth it.

• 
  35 million rolls of paper flushed every day

But wait! Don't let the PR folks over at Kimberly Clark find out
about your newly awakened enlightenment concerning taking a shit;
Kimberly Clark just introduced their 'Jumbo roll.' That's right folks,
now you can shit more often and use less paper because the Jumbo
roll is bigger and reduces waste. Don't ask me how the fuck that
works but I suppose Kimberly Clark thinks it will.

I can just see Flames, there he is on his end of the internet at his
console laughing his ass off at this just before he leaves for the
toilet. Don't worry Flames, ever since reading John's essay three
years ago I haven't used toilet paper since. You would not believe
how creative I have become cleaning up fecal matter.

The Kimberly Clark people are really some astounding ignoramuses,
they talk about how many trees can be saved at their site without
cutting down virgin trees for pulp; that's corporate mentality for you.
Just stop using toilet paper.

Too embarrassed Flames? Okay, not to worry, I'll let you slip
by using Kimberly Clark's 'tubeless' rolls of toilet paper:

• 

Now comes Doc Mercola, and he's got the same message for you.
I swear, this guy is the only person I know of who can get excited
about describing how wonderful it feels to clean all the fecal matter
off from around your asshole using water after taking a dump:

[Flames]

You're hilarious, TG. That was a good read. The ironic part is, I saw that Doc. Mercola video in his e-mail today. That man is in the perfect profession for himself. I wonder if he's O.C.D. sometimes, I really do. But I feel his work is important, and I've learned a hell of a lot from him.

Regarding toilet paper vs. the "sprayer thingy", I'm just not sold on it yet. But I will not knock something that I haven't tried myself. It is pretty nutty when one thinks about how much paper is uselessly wasted. I'd be willing into looking into an alternative to toilet paper, just for the environmental reasons alone.

Who knows, 10 years from now, Amurikans might not have reason to wipe their asses, because there might not be any more asses to wipe. Sometimes when I really think about it, I can't help but to laugh, a little, just at the fact that America ever existed in the first place. What a silly and sad part of human history.

[KapitanScarlet]

nice topic TG , i will get a toilet/bidet combined unit when i replace my existing , with thermostatic water feed of course .
Wonder if homos prefer this option for the titilation factor in trap 2
Is it true the indians use their left hand to swipe

[Flames]

Wonder if homos prefer this option for the titilation factor in trap 2
Is it true the indians use their left hand to swipe

As far as the left hand wiping is concerned... that is just insane! Who would do such a thing! For christ sakes, I'm left handed, and even I use my right hand to wipe!

You know, Kapis... it's funny you should mention that. I was just listening to a Podcast where an Australian MMA reporter in Tokyo was talking this. He said something about woman being able to "get off" on these things. Maybe TG has more info about this stuff. Afterall, aren't the Japanese like the kings and queens of the world at "getting off" on just about everything!?

TG, have you ever considered the possibility that the Japanese are aliens? I'll briefly just say, that I have. When I look at their alphabet (if that's what it really is), and just the way these people are, the obvious thing that comes to my mind is: "they're from outer space."

[quicksilvercrescendo]

You can now buy and install a small bidet unit in an existing toilet that will "clean the crack".

And they also make a toilet seat with a built in mechanism that will also do the same thing.

[Flames]

small bidet unit

Now, can you adjust the water temperature with these bidet units? The thought of cold water spraying my asshole makes me a cringe a little. I suppose if it were near body temperature it wouldn't be so bad.

[quicksilvercrescendo]

http://www.biobidet.com/BB1000_SupremeBidet.htm

I just built a new bathroom and have one like this one. My asshole has never been happier and sings me praises everyday.

The hydraulic seat and cover feature means when you go to close the toilet you can just tap the seat and it will slowly descend down at a slow pace...rather than gravity crashing it down hard and making a loud noise.

I also have a good home colonic irrigation table-unit that is integral with my toilet. But the use of a professional is unmatched in this...ahem..."area".

[tgII]

Qsc, a singing asshole, that is ecstasy.

That's basically the set up I have acquired; before that I just
reached down into the toilet bowl with my right hand and gave
the asshole a good washing.

[quicksilvercrescendo]

Yes, the massage feature is heavenly.

Not to mention the warm air dry.

I squeak when I walk..so damn clean.

But you need access to an electric outlet for hookup.

[tgII]

I should give a run down on these Japanese machines; talk about
high tech. It makes going into the toilet like going in for a Thai
massage; you don't want to come out.

[quicksilvercrescendo]

Does that mean you are interested in the 9" anal massage probe with oscillation feature?

[tgII]

Only if its coated with olive oil and there are fine little brushes on it.

[quicksilvercrescendo]

...so I will not add the "flame thrower" option with your order sir.

[tgII]

What a fascinating topic: anal research; the psychology of toiletry.

Oh God no!!! A flame thrower?!

[quicksilvercrescendo]

Actually the best way to defecate is standing and squatting. Many middle-east people have squatting toilets. This is ideal. I have that option with an external device around the toilet as well, but then one must maneuver most cautiously to now enjoy the bidet, yet the remote control is most helpful in this endeavor.

My pictures of the bathroom contortions and acrobatics, along with pix and analysis of my daily droppings are on facebook...enjoy.

[tgII]

Facebook exploits in the toilet - cool.

Flames, it's like necrophilia only I can't remember the term
for fecal fascination. Here in Japan-land, where it is becoming
increasingly difficult to tell the difference between the local
natives and aliens, there are businesses that cater to men who
are fascinated with watching a girl take a shit. They pay to
watch women squat down in front of them and drop a stool
while taking digital pictures.

[quicksilvercrescendo]

I met a woman who would pay YOU $20 to shit on her.

Let's just say that was an interesting 30 minute talk with another life form.

[tgII]

These primordial neurotic primitive fascinations.

[KapitanScarlet]

someone told me the indians use their "naked" left hand to swipe and their "naked" right hand to eat , just be careful when shaking hands with an ambidextrous indian

[Flames]

I hate to change the topic, but I thought I'd ask you guys a question about coffee. I hope I'm not turning into some kind of coffee snob, though I'm sure I'm addicted to coffee. I'll just tell you a quick story, to set up my question.

For the life of me, I cannot find any coffee shop around that will sell me a cup of French Roast coffee. I'm not familiar with coffee snobs, and it wasn't apparent to me, that you basically don't ask for French Roast, because "they" claim it takes forever to make.

Oh! But get ready to LOL, in a second. Think of this scenario. On my quest to try to find out what a French Roast coffee tasted like, I thought "Shit, if Starbucks won't have it, than there must be no such thing."

So I went through the drive up, and asked for a "French Roast coffee", and the dude working there said "uh, sorry, if you want that you gotta come inside, because there will be a line." I could have sworn the guy looked just exactly like Shaggy from Scooby fucking Doo.

I parked my car, went inside and asked the gal working inside there if I could have a French Roast. These dead beat hippy dippy eyes looked up at me and said "sorry sir, but that would require us to have to do a French Press, and that could take a long time." "Our special bold coffee this month is the Christmas blend." I politely accepted.

Maybe it's my own fault for not doing any research whatsoever about what a French Press was. So here it is. Does anyone here own a French Press coffee maker? Anyone grind their own beans? Anyone here enjoy really bold flavor?

I'm looking at a couple of models on Amazon and here's what I'm thinking about getting.

French Press model:

http://www.amazon.com/Bodum-1928-16US6-Chambord-Coffee-Press/dp/B00005LM0S/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1291344208&sr=8-1

Grinder:

http://www.amazon.com/Krups-203-42-Touch-Coffee-Grinder/dp/B00004SPEU/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1291345229&sr=8-1

If it aint apparent by now, I like my coffee with a bold flavor.

[Sputnik]

The Bodum Coffee Press and the Krupp mill are both good choices. It doesn't take too long to make coofee with it, but I guess it throws the waiter off when he is supposed to not spend more than a minute on each costumer, that's how gastronomic services and their products are designed these days. Maximising profit.

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